Hola! Buenos dias, buenas tardes, buenas noches!
I am dropping the burden that I have been
keeping for weeks here. I am writing about something that I have never told you
before. Not because I do not want to, but I just had it few weeks ago. I am new
on this field. Here is my story.
Relationship. It is weird as it may sound.
Two people have agreed to stay together by heart. Their hearts are locked to
each other and stay by each other’s company for a long period of time, or as they
could wish. People in a relationship wish to be on each other’s side every time.
To be able to give their partner hugs, kisses, hold their hands, admire each other while looking at their eyes. It’s beautiful, isn’t it?
Sadly, not everyone has the privilege of
having their partner by their side. Some people have to be in someplace while
their partner is in the other. A long-distance relationship does exist. Only a strong couple who really loves each other can make it. Is love enough? No.
Love
may bring two people together. Commitment ties. A long-distance relationship
works when the couple agrees on commitment. They want to commit, they’re ready
to commit, they commit.
Hold on. Should I have talked about my
story here? But, why is it the other way around? Here is the first story.
My heart had not let any man enter for
years. It was locked until an unknown period of time because I, shamelessly say
this, focused on my study. Sounds cliché, does not it? But I did. Well, it was
finally opened once in my senior year in high school. There is a guy who lives
overseas which I thank Omegle for connecting us. My feelings grew as our
chat intensified. His image was stuck in me for four years although he did not
talk to me for more than a year. As loyal human as I am, I refused to see another
guy. Did he know about this? Of course. Not.
I, finally, get over this guy in the fourth
semester when I was in the university. My heart started to lock itself from any stranger to get
in. My logic said I should set aside feeling for a while and listen to it more
often. Sadly, I disappointed my logic for the second time.
After being done with the overseas guy, I liked a guy who just broke up. It should have been obvious that a broken heart will not be fixed in seconds,
days, or weeks. Some people need years, some need all of their life to healing. Especially,
when you have already invested your heart in a person and have been with that person
for years. It will not be an easy task to get over. And the guy I was having a romantic relationship with was, has been, dealing with this. I perfectly knew he was just
having a breakup with his 4-year girlfriend two weeks prior. Yet, I still
proceed to continue.
I should have listened to my gut. He was
not, has not been, ready for a new one as the previous wound has not healed. Was
he searching for a rebound, I did not know (or more likely he was). I did not know
how a rebound relationship works that little did I know, I was chosen to nurse his
feeling back to health. He seemed committed to our relationship, though. I was
fooled.
He said, “I cannot believe I am in a
long-distance relationship. Would you do it with me?”
“Give me your ID number, I am buying a
train ticket for you to go home at the end of the month. Do you want to snorkel? I
will book one for us.”
“I want to drive your parents to have
some vacation in your place as we pick you up on semester break, what do you
think?”
Which of those that he had done? None.
We are from the same city while currently, I stay 300
km away to pursue my degree. I was assured that he was committed to our
relationship. It went well. Until one day, I saw him still keeping
his then on his radar. I was hurt. Being a stupid and loyal partner as I am, I still
kept him for two weeks. Again, he did something worse that made me think, “Okay,
I have had enough.”
I did have enough. I value myself by not
keeping someone who does not value me any longer.
Do I still care, though? I do. Do I still
want to talk to him? I do. Man, I know you are fighting your problems with your
jobs, family, moreover the unhealed would of your previous relationship. I would
still want to help, actually. But for the last problem, obviously.
You said you love me, I let you into me. You
said you wanted to commit, I trusted you. But, dishonesty within yourself and
to me, breaks me.
We wanted to be in each other’s companion.
We wanted to work for it. We thought we were strong enough in this
relationship. Unfortunately, the long-distance relationship does not work for us
this time.
Am I still feeling hurt now? I am not. I have been fully recovered. I am so thankful for myself for that, that I am good at letting go (giving no damn) of what should be gone. I do not feel sorrow while listening to songs I could relate to. I no longer feel sad when recalling our small memories. Thank you. Thank you for being a small part of my life. Thank you for the 2-month rebound relationship I had never thought would happen to me.
Thank you for existing.
Love unites, commitment ties, dishonesty breaks.
Am I still feeling hurt now? I am not. I have been fully recovered. I am so thankful for myself for that, that I am good at letting go (giving no damn) of what should be gone. I do not feel sorrow while listening to songs I could relate to. I no longer feel sad when recalling our small memories. Thank you. Thank you for being a small part of my life. Thank you for the 2-month rebound relationship I had never thought would happen to me.
Thank you for existing.
